Testimonial

Le Phare came into our lives one month after the death of our baby.

In July 2022, we became parents to Maximiliano. It was the start of a new chapter—parenthood, with all the promise it brings. But from his very first days, worry was there: developmental delays, health problems, so much uncertainty…

For nearly a year, we tried everything. Without a clear diagnosis, we moved forward not knowing what was ahead. Then, around his first birthday, we had to make the hardest decision of all: to let him take his wings.

One month after his passing, a door opened. The hospital team told us about Le Phare. That’s where our journey through grief began.

As a couple, but also as individuals, we needed to make sense of what had just happened. As a mother, I felt powerless, unable to help my baby the way I wanted.

We soon began grief counselling with Li-Anne, a social worker at Le Phare. This support came at exactly the right moment. We were each experiencing our grief and frustrations so differently. The couples’ counselling helped us understand one another, put words on our pain, and stay united through the storm.

As a father, I put a lot of pressure on myself. I felt I had to be strong for both of us, to carry all of our family’s suffering for Amy.

The bereaved fathers’ support group at Le Phare showed me I wasn’t alone. I realized I didn’t need to carry it all. Being surrounded by other dads going through the same thing gave me space to talk, to be understood, and to be vulnerable.

This group is unique. We move, we talk. We share memories and stories. It was the first time I had ever joined something like that. At first it wasn’t easy, but little by little, I learned to speak, to put words to what I was feeling.

And then came the holiday season—a time of year that will never be the same again for us. When your child is no longer there, you honestly wonder what there is left to celebrate. It’s heavy, when the absence feels even more present.

One service that has been deeply meaningful for us is the Holiday Workshop. Every December, Le Phare brings together bereaved families for a day to honour the memory of our child. We create, we make crafts with photos of our baby, we share, and we understand each other without needing to explain much. We’ve taken part twice now, and each time we left feeling lighter. These moments allow us to keep a place for Maximiliano, to keep him alive in another way within our family.

Today, we are still together, stronger than before. This journey, as painful as it has been, has helped us grow as parents, as individuals, and as a couple.

Because when you go through such a loss, you think you’re alone. You think no one can really understand. But at Le Phare, we found professionals who listened, families who were living the same grief, and a place where we could be fully supported.